Chick-fil-a

Here's an email that has been making the rounds in academic circles.
I don't know if it's true or not... but if so this is the best excuse for missing a final exam that I have ever heard.

Professor [name],

I am in your MWF 8:00 a.m. [class] and I was wondering if there is any possible way I could take the exam on Monday, Tuesday, afternoon/late Thursday, or Friday? I know this is late notice, but something has come up that would, if I could go, require me to leave very early Wednesday morning and not arrive back in [our town] until Thursday morning. I would like to attend the Chick-fil-A opening in [city 2 hours away]. If you are one of the first one hundred people to arrive at a Chick-fil-A opening, you recieve free Chick-fil-A for a whole year. Because [our school] has a Chick-fil-A on campus, I would then be able to get a smaller meal plan and consequently save some money. This event is so popular that most of the 100 arrive very early in the morning the day before the opening and camp out the night before. Some even arrive days before the opening. To contend with the other potential first 100 arrivals, my ride would like to leave a great deal before my exam 8:00-10:00 a.m. on Wednesday. I know this may seem like an unusual request, but I would greatly appreciate anything you could do.

Thanks!
[student name]

I can't wait to take the exam!

Sent to a reader the night before the final, which was scheduled for the following afternoon:

I realize this is last minute, but if there was any possibility for me to take the final at the earlier time, 8 am Monday, that would be greatly appreciated.
Thanks
[student name]

The professor's response:

[student name]:
You mean, like, 12 hours from right now? No way.
Prof [profname]

Please email me the answers

Here's one from a reader who apparently has a national reputation for helping students cram for finals. This student was not in the reader's course, nor even a student at his school!

From: [Student not from where I work]
Sent: Monday, January 14, 2008 2:30 PM
To: [Professor]
Subject: [Course I taught in Spring Semester 2008]

Dear [Prof's Last Name],

I m a [discipline in which you teach] student and i am taking the course of [junior/senior level subject], our supplementary book is [Classic text on the subject]. I have a final exam on 17th of January and i am trying to solve exercises on the book but i am having some difficulties with the exercises at the end of the section [specific number]. if you have answers to these questions could you please mail them to me, not all of them are necessary i m trying to solve as much as i can so that i can trust myself more. Thanks for your attention.

[First name of student]

Leave your suggested email responses to this student in the comments...